Thursday, September 29, 2011

The Saturdays put down the poppers for 'My Heart Takes Over' - listen to the premiere now!

Not Girls Aloud.
The Saturdays, in all their handlers' infinite wisdom, decided to chuck in the R&B-lite sound they had since their inception, and go for a full-on club attack on their new album 'On Your Radar' - a new album which has already had three singles taken from it, and won't even be out until next year.  So basically it will be a compilation album of a bunch of singles you've already heard, and some filler tracks that after hearing you'll wish you hadn't.

But insane state-of-the-industry rantings aside, we're totally fans of The Sats' new direction, albeit in an apathetic "meh" kind of way.  Sure, they're chasing the Britney/Rihanna/Everyone Else trend, and yeah, they haven't put out even one song in their entire history that could qualify as a "classic," but is anyone really expecting any sort of artistic achievement from these ladies?

The answer is no.

To be completely fair (AS WE ALWAYS ARE Ed: this is blatantly false. Delete.) the album's second single 'All Fired Up' was a bit of an underrated masterpiece of forward-thinking pop, but again, to be completely fair (Ed: STOP SAYING THIS) the band themselves really had nothing to do with it other than showing up for a few minutes and yelling into an autotune machine.

For album single number 3,  the girls have done one of those songs that happens during a concert right after the band has said something like "if it's all right with you, we're going to slow it on down."  Inevitably, in those situations, it most certainly is NOT alright with us, but it's something we all have to deal with and sometimes we all have to realize not everything can be glitterbomb donk fierceness all the time.  As mid-tempo ballads go, it's actually not half bad, but it's got a shelf-life of about a week on our iPod after which it will fade into oblivion only to be recalled in the context of the group's Wikipedia discography.  

Long story short, at the end of the day we're left with some girls who sing what their told to, some label execs who have made relatively wise decisions regarding their repertoire, and the comforting personal knowledge that the Sats' new track is fine and that when the album FINALLY comes out after another six singles and a stadium tour, it will be fine too.

Which is good enough.