Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Melanie C's new single is confusing - watch the premiere of the 'Rock Me' video now!

"not a lesbian"
Melanie C was a Spice Girl and then she wasn't.  She was a solo dance-pop star and then she wasn't.  Most recently, though, Mel was a sort of indie-rock chick, but if her new single is anything to go by, NOW SHE ISN'T.

If all of this flip-flopping leaves you a bit confused as to what Melanie "is," exactly, we don't blame you, and it certainly doesn't help matters that the single that is meant to announce to the world that she is NO LONGER "ROCK" is ACTUALLY CALLED 'ROCK ME.'

But her management's utter lack of situational awareness aside, C's new track is actually kind of a jam.  Not a "this will be huge" jam, though.  More of a "this would have been huge if it had been recorded by Kelly Clarkson in 2004," or perhaps more accurately, "by Sophie Ellis-Bextor when she was, you know, popular," kind of jam.

As for the video, it's nothing spectacular. Since the song will be used as the theme for the upcoming FIFA womens' soccer/football competition, there are lots of soccer-y people doing soccer-y things which is all well and good, but we don't even get to see them until like a minute into the clip after Mel has firmly established that she should NEVER AGAIN BE ALLOWED TO DANCE UNDER ANY SET OF CIRCUMSTANCES.