Some math.

That is all.

Chart Chat UK, Aug. 9, 2009

Another week, another new number 1 on the UK chart. Tinchy Stryder and Amelle (of Sugababes fame) scream into the pole position, relegating Black Eyed Peas to number 2. Tinchy is becoming quite a force to be reckoned with, as this is his third top 5 hit this year. The only other new entry into the top 10 this week is the Ian Carey Project with dance tune 'Get Shaky.' There's not much else to be said about this run-of-the-mill club track, and while a number 10 hit is nothing to sniff at, the song is hardly a breakout success. The chart gets more interesting down at number 14, where up-and-comer Little Boots screams up 19 places with her new single 'Remedy.' It seems like the tastemakers will finally be vindicated after next week's full release when I'd put all bets on this being in the top 10. Not so lucky are Girls Can't Catch, whose debut single clocks in at 26. The midweeks indicated the latest girl-band might trouble the upper half of the top 40 right out of the gate, but alas it was not to be. The jury is still out on the group's success, and we'll see where the track goes from here.

The UK Top Ten:
1 - Tinchy Stryder ft Amelle: Never Leave You
2 - Black Eyed Peas: I Gotta Feeling
3 - Mr. Hudson ft Kanye West: Supernova
4 - JLS: Beat Again
5 - Beyonce: Sweet Dreams
6 - Pitbull: I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)
7 - Cascada: Evacuate the Dancefloor
8 - La Roux: Bulletproof
9 - Lady Gaga: Paparazzi
10 - Ian Carey Project: Get Shaky

Beth Ditto does her best Kate Gosselin

The Gossip have a new video out for 'Love Long Distance.' It's a typical Gossip-y affair of guitars and throbbing bass but the most notable thing about this video is the animated Beth Ditto reverse-mullet. Kate Gosselin claims another victim :(

Madonna made a song and then someone made it better

The mantis-armed matriarch of pop has released a new song and while it may be a derivative Frankenstein of every dancefloor-of-a-seedy-gay-bar anthem she has ever done, it certainly isn't bad. In a SHOCKING TWIST she has allowed the song to be remixed by some famous and trendy DJ and the result pretty much speaks for itself. It's the Material Girl's world and we're just living in it.

Sign of the Apocalypse #2

Scopitone Saturday!!

This week's selection is a strange hybrid of Paris tourism and a general dislike of the English. It features a woman singing in French about the English and then a very bored woman in a bikini dancing, presumably also about the English, in that way that you can 'dance about' something in an interpretive sense. It is both AMAZING and mildly offensive, which makes it somehow DOUBLY AMAZING.

a ROBOT that makes MUSIC

As the headline indicates this post is about a ROBOT that makes MUSIC. Its name (as robots tend to eschew gendered identities) is the VX-323 and it is AMAZING, not only because it is a robot that makes music but because the music is also very good. It is often best to let artists describe themselves, so here's the 'About Me' from VX's Myspace: "I am the VX-323: singer, songwriter, musician. My main function is as a speech synthesizer. I speak many languages in many voices, and can keep a beat. My interests and passions are many and varied - including electronic device/robot rights issues, technology, and the FUTURE. Although a serious artist, I am not too serious to appreciate the bling, DC devices, and high energy charges I will get when I become famous. "

AMAZING.

Kylie update from Denmark

It's only a few weeks now until Kylie hits the U.S. for the first time (AMAZING), and here are some pics via her official website of her performing in Denmark. They are very small. But so is Kylie so it all works out.