This "Chris Brown doing music with Rihanna" thing needs to be stopped immediately - listen to his track feat. Rihanna, and hers feat. him

pow.

We haven't made it any secret that we are at the point of being completely over the inbreeding vocal orgy of "so-and-so featuring so-and-so" that has taken over music.  In only the rarest of circumstances does it have anything to do with making a track better, and is nearly always exclusively about selling more records.

Add to our hatred of opportunistic "featuring" credits our loathing of Chris Brown, and we have a PERFECT STORM OF US BEING FUSSY ABOUT SOMETHING.

And the thing is in this case it's not even just one track.  No.  It's two.  THAT IS DOUBLE THE AMOUNT OF ONE.  Because while we all knew last week that Chris "Domestic Abuser" Brown was to feature on Rihanna's 'Birthday Cake,' what we didn't count on is that she would decide to return the favor and guest on Chris's 'Turn Up The Music.'

We're still seething at Brown's super classy opening line on 'Birthday Cake' - "Girl, I wanna fuck you right now / Been a long time, I've been missing your body" - so admittedly we're not listening to his new track with a particularly open mind.  But even if that weren't the case we're pretty sure we'd still call it mediocre at best.


Here's 'Turn Up The Music':
   

And in case you missed it, Rihanna's 'Birthday Cake':